 |
| I've been trying to keep busy by taking photos of the kids and documenting the last few days of the wait. |
We are “next in line”, which in terms of China adoption and
for lack of a better example, is like taking a number at the deli counter. You
take the ticket with your number (in this case our Log In Date) and you wait
for your number to be called. China has referred through October 13, 2006, but
considering that October 14th and 15th were a Saturday
and Sunday, we are next up.
But when? We are so close and after 6 plus years of waiting,
these are the hardest, the days, weeks when you are closest to referral. We’ve handled the six years of waiting pretty
well, sure, there were moments we questioned whether we would continue, and it
was frustrating, but looking back, it seemed easy compared with the last few
days since we heard official word that China was matching, that someone in
Beijing was dusting off our dossier and matching a little girl with us,
determining that she would be Emma Claire.
Why am I on edge, checking email and FB and Rumor Queen
every 15 minutes? I’ve made it 6 years, surely I can make it another few days?
I even looked up the psychology of waiting. It seems once it is your turn, your
time, we become less patient and the more anxious we grow, the longer the
waiting seems.
This adoption will be our third international adoption and
our second from China. But each adoption has been VERY different.
If you asked me at the time, I wouldn’t have agreed, but Oliver’s
adoption from Ethiopia in 2009/10 was the smoothest and easiest, which is
surprising because China is considered the most stable and straightforward
international adoption process, one reason it still remains #1 in international
adoption despite the long wait.
We only waited 6 months for our referral for Oliver, which
at the time seemed like an eternity since you can get the call at any time once
your dossier is sent to Ethiopia and you are matched to a child meeting your
requests. We knew people that got a referral in one week and others in two
months. It could come at any time after our dossier arrived in Addis Ababa.
And, there is no “heads up” like China that your referral is on its way. In
fact, I almost didn’t answer the phone when our agency called with our
referral!
While Chloe’s adoption in 2004/05 wasn’t long and didn’t hit
any snags, it was our first adoption, our first child and we were nervous and
anxious and full of emotion. Up until our LID was at the front of the line,
China had been referring almost one and a half months of log in dates. We
thought for certain we would get a referral in February 2005, but China only
referred one month of LIDs and we didn’t make the cut off. I was crushed. I was
so upset when I got the email from our agency that we would have to wait until
March, but that we would be next. I was teaching school and can remember
reading the email and thinking I couldn’t teach the rest of the day. I did
teach and I did make it until March and we did get our referral.
And now, as we are so close, I have to remind myself that if
the referral arrives in February and not this month, that it is ok. We will get
our referral. It’s only a few more days and we can celebrate the Chinese New
Year with our referral.
No comments
Post a Comment